My goodness, where have I been aye?
I hope whoever is reading this is well.
It’s April 2020 and we are on lockdown yo! Mother nature is in her element and the earth is saying thank you to the Karmic deities. I’m happy for you Mother nature. 😘
I’m not going to mention the v*rus thing too much as I’m sure we’ve all had enough of that. I just simply wanted to say hello and connect with you all.
I’ve titled this post ‘peace’. Why ‘peace?’ Maybe it’s because I hardly get any. I’m at peace with a lot of things but having it is something I continue to strive for. Being on lockdown has truly made me realise how much chaos I behold. I have to be honest. My mind is chaotic so my surroundings look chaotic. some of my practices are chaotic and sometimes my communication is chaotic because of how I’m processing things in my mind. Being at home has been great but I’ve really begun to deeply understand how very affected I am by everyone’s energy at home. I often feel people’s energy anyway but this is different. Having to don the roles of the wife, mum, school teacher, school cook, logistics manager, HR, family liaison officer, hunter + gatherer and the rest, leaves me pretty exhausted. Let me not even start with social media and all these new apps popping up all over the place. I never heard of ‘Zoom’ before all of this. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve loved the connecting. It just requires a lot of energy.
What does ‘peace’ mean to you? What does it look like and how does it feel?
It’s really weird as I never thought about peace until a couple of years ago. My ultimate vision of peace is waking up in a calm and tidy household, sitting on my balcony welcoming the morning. If you ever saw the state of me in the morning, you would realise how far away I am from this vision. My mornings really aren’t that pretty but they are beautiful. They are beautiful because I have my family but the jigsaw that is my surroundings is still in pieces. I guess my biggest confirmation of peace right now is knowing my children are happy and well. When they cuddle me and express their love for me I feel that instant peace. It’s a wholesome feeling that I am beyond grateful for. It’s a boundless blessing.
As I’m writing out my thoughts, I have been forced to start small by looking at the smaller things. This is why I strongly believe in practicing using perspective. It helps. In the midst of my actual heartache of not having the peace I deeply crave, I actually have the biggest piece of peace, which is love.
I work hard at everything I do. I just feel sad that the presentation of things aren’t the way I intended. This does not deter me from striving though. I still believe in creating peace. Whether it’s within myself, amongst others or in my space, peace is hella important. It’s mighty. It’s downright necessary.
I don’t know if you’re anything like me but sadly I spend too much time on Instagram. I’m not just laughing at memes and comical videos, I spend a lot of time being sucked into people’s peaceful looking photos. I get sucked into the white background with the freshly picked flowers for the kitchen. I get sucked into the images of a lady sitting in her garden with a cup of coffee. I get sucked into kids bedrooms with themes and colour coded chest of drawers and coat pegs. I get sucked in although I know that people aren’t always ready and willing to show their bad days, messy living room, broken furniture or unhinged gate. I get sucked in because their presentation appeals to me but boy don’t I know the sh*t that some of these people have to do before they take and upload that picture. I’m not completely gullible, just a fraction of the time I am.
As I draw this post to an end. I’m understanding that ‘peace’ is like a relationship. It requires continuous work. Efforts need to be made. Compassion needs to be present. I guess this is why world peace still hasn’t been declared. It’s actually complex as we all have different interpretations of things. Especially the idea of peace.
Before I go, I’d like to wish many people peace. Those in war torn countries, those without shelter, those at risk, those who can’t get out and those who feel deep internal conflict. I also feel for those who are on their own and are struggling day to day. Being on your own doesn’t guarantee peace. The mind can work overtime and cause a sense of turmoil.
Whilst on this lockdown, I feel it’s important to tell you that you don’t have to prove anything during this time. You don’t have to start up a new business unless you feel ready to. You don’t have to start a new course until your mind is settled. It’s a different kinda time. Just go with the flow. Take each day as it comes.
As I draw this post to a close (for real now), I’d like to thank the indigenous people of ‘Native’ America, Australia and other stolen lands for the rituals and natural healing properties we are allowed to have and know about. I am thankful for ‘sage smudging’ and ‘essential oils’. The practice of burning sage truly helps settle me and brings me to a peaceful state. Essential oils help with healing and protecting. I am thankful for Africa. I am also thankful for customs of the world that are often stolen or sometimes frowned upon until they are made popular by ‘glossier and highly profiled humans’. Before we had ‘Vegan’ we had ‘Ital’. I’ll leave it there! 🤔
Stay true, stay safe and be mindful!